Tuesday, July 2, 2013

JESUS OF THE YORUBAS by Ena Ofugara

Religion has always been a tool of subjugation. You cannot truly lead control a people unless you give them your God. King Nebuchadnezzar knew this hence he made it a law for Jews not to pray to any other god but his and which led to his throwing Shedrach, Meshach and Abednego in the Fiery Furnace and Daniel in the Lion's Den. Emperor Constantinople knew this so he made Christianity a state religion. The cross was the symbol with which soldiers were to march. The prophet Mohammed knew this and so till date Arabs will die for the cause. Rome continues this through the Pope and Great Britain knew to come to Africa with the gun and the Bible.

Thus you can appropriately say that he who controls the spiritual life and thinking rules the people.

I have often wondered if Niger Deltans understand just how much we rely on the Yorubas for spiritual direction. Ok, thru Idahosa, the Edos have learnt to believe that God can lead them through one of their own. Pastor Chris Oyakhilome has taken his spiritual leadership to heights unimaginable and you can almost tell the church an Esan attends. It is very likely to be Christ Embassy. So do not be surprised if my "blooder" Iriogbe Kingsley takes up the maddest defense of Pastor Oyakhilome.

However for the average Niger Deltan from Sapele thru Asaba, over Bayelsa to Akwa Ibom and Port Harcourt, if it is not a church formed by the Yorubas, they will not worship....save for the Roman Catholics amongst them.
The Anglican church has at its helm Yorubas.

My mother is Baptist and I know for spiritual absolution, she and the rest of the Baptist Church leadership arrive at Ede, a Yoruba village. The top echelon of the church are Yorubas.

The most influential church in the 80's was Deeper Life as formed by Kumuyi a Yoruba.

The most popular church which has knocked Christ Embassy from its perch is The Winner's Chapel as formed by David Oyedepo a Yoruba. In fact, Winner's Sapele became the in-place to be under Yoruba pastorship. My people just flocked down leaving Catholic Church, Baptist, Methodist and Christ Embassy in droves.

Redeemed also is impacting the whole of the Niger Delta and the membership grows exponentially and the church was formed by a Yoruba and the current G.O is Adeboye and he is Yoruba.

These Yoruba pastors are aware of their target demographic (I refuse to say customers) hence their camps are in Mowe/Ibafo on the outskirts of Lagos, easily accessible by travelling "pilgrims" from Delta and Edo and other southern states...Yes, Omobude and Ayo Oritsejafor no longer have the following they used to. While Pastor Oyedepo is on his fourth jet, people do not believe Pastor Ayo's congregation is rich or many enough to afford a plane hence the insistence that it is the President that bought it for him.

Now a fact people refuse to admit is that another Yoruba spiritual leader is in their homes and lives and has the ultimate secret but utter belief and he is Pastor T.B Joshua. People's television are tuned in to Emmanuel TV by default. Also what you may not know MANY PEOPLE PAY THEIR TITHES TO SYNAGOGUE AND NOT THE CHURCH THEY ATTEND IN THE NIGER DELTA.

Yes Ikhortoun Lagos where the church is located  may be too faraway and "sojourns" and "pilgrimages" to The Synagogue may not yield the desired result as seeing the pastor who is highly sought after by Kings and Presidents of various countries, may be a task too difficult to achieve. However, your tithe may get you healed and indeed "be it unto you according to your faith"

Are you old and not yet married? Well Pastor Bimbo Odukoya (now late) would have ahad a thing to tell Jesus about your situation in her Fountain of Life Ministry.

Now as it relates to pregnancies, if the fruit of the womb is not forthcoming despite your best efforts at the  horizontals, The Laughter Foundation Church as headed by Pastor Gbenga Osho popularly known as Baba one Million Babies”" will tell Jesus to thicken the sperm and add Michael Phelps-like swimmers and egg bursters  and fertilize the egg....even if the woman does not see her time of month, as in she is past menopause.

Now make no mistake, I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES. In fact, I playfully call myself Prophet TB Ena in clear passing off of the Pastor TB Joshua brand. I have found that thoughts that come to me usually come to pass and frankly it scares me sometimes how I go out on a limb and I find that 95 percent of the time, against better judgement, I am right. I also believe that God does not care what tribe one comes from even if they all are from one tribe.... The Jews were/are chosen. It is why I am wondering if Yorubas have been chosen as the spiritual head of the Niger Deltans.

I mean, Kefee the Urhobo music icon goes to Lagos and instead of attending Pastor Chris Okotie who is a musician like her, she gravitates seamlessly to House on The Rock, pastored by another Yoruba Pastor Adefarasin.

Now as is done in biology, let us look at the "economic importance" of Niger Deltans unshakeable belief in Yorubas as their spiritual head.

1. The moneys leave the Niger Delta and enriches the West

Yorubas are tooooo brilliant. They may not have much oil (save Ondo) But they have the wealthiest Nigerians. Until Dangote's recent rise, the top 3 richest Nigerians were Harry Akande, MKO Abiola and Fernadez....all Yoruba. The wealthiest black woman in all the world is a certain Yoruba woman and it is from Niger Delta Oil. In the same vein, the Yoruba pastors are siphoning ten percent of each Niger Deltan's earning. That is not all, they get "seeds", vows, partnerships, give your all etc monies and em...actually....em....it does not find its way back to the Niger Delta but to the US, and to Maybach (really expensive car) and Jet manufacturers.

2. The Niger Deltan's psyche is thus favourably disposed to Yorubas

as leaders and us as subjects or mere "church members". It is why Ibori will be a thief to the Niger Deltan while Tinubu is a demi-god....when Tinubu is as much if not even more of a thief.

3. President Goodluck Jonathan must "dobale" openly too get spiritual guidance.

Now make no mistake, I SEE NOTHING WRONG IN KNEELING OR EVEN LYING DOWN FOR YOUR GOD IN FRONT OF HIS PROPHET, but the fact remains that anyone seeking higher office from the Niger Delta has to be endorsed/supported by the Yoruba clergy

4. The Niger Delta will never break off and form a new country from Nigeria without the Yorubas coming along

(you want break from your pastor????)

5. Two Yoruba men can influence how Niger Deltans act even in their bedrooms. THEY ARE THAT POWERFUL. Since Pastor Adeboye said cunninglingus and fellatio are bad and immoral even between a husband and a wife, many husbands with "born again wives" have found the matrimonial bedroom less exciting and satisfying, and vice versa. Remember, just because you see papa and mama Ebiye going to church together always, that they both are strong believers. Mama Ebiye may not really like God in the way Papa Ebiye does and she may need a little more than hip action and the "First missionary journey"


Yes we have an exception in Pastor Chris Okotie. But he is not so followed back home. WE ARE ONLY USED TO YORUBAS AS JESUS CHOSEN SPIRITUAL LEADERS in the Niger Delta. The spiritual exploits of the Okonkwos mean little to the Naija Deltans. YOU MUST BE YORUBA or at least Edo named Chris Oyakhilome.

For those who feel it is because there are no Niger Delta Pastors, I hereby introduce  you to Saint Dikeji Miyerijesu Nigeria's First Saint Ordained By God (formerly Mimeyeraye). His appelations include but not limited to "Rt. Rev. Evang. Daniel Dikeji MiyeriJesu, The Demon Destroyer, aka Osu (Leader), Founder, God’s Grace Ministry Inc. And by the Divine Grace of God, the Bishop of the whole world."
Yes he said he was ordained by God himself as first Bishop of the whole world and now he is a living saint. A worshipper informs us "Bishop Daniel Dikeji MiyeriJesu was not ordained by any human being either dead or alive. He was ordained by God Himself. Amazing!

The Bishop of the whole world
Few years ago, Bishop Daniel Dikeji MiyeriJesu had a dream in more than two occasions where the Lord came and laid hands on his head. The exercise became so frequent that when the Bishop wants to go to bed in the night, he would be afraid because of the mighty hands that always come on his head and at the same time exerting pressure on his neck. The hands would rest upon his head so mightily that even in reality he would be experiencing pains around his neck. In the course of this occurrence, God spoke to him that “He was ordaining him as the Bishop of the whole world”. In another occasion, the Lord God Almighty carried him up to the sky and he was asked to draw a line round the sky with his hand. This he did and the Lord said unto him, “what you have done means that, through you I will convert the lost souls in the whole world to my kingdom.”
Another worshipper told me where I went to eat Owobeans and starch and tico meat and yam combination in Reclamation road, opposite Cherubim and Seraphim (another Yoruba formed church) that Pastor Miyerijesu, Dikeji, the Osu (leader) and Bishop of The Whole World went to Heaven and God asked Jesus to stand up from the chair for him to sit down so they can discuss....He and The Creator of Heaven and earth.

Now make no mistake, this guy has almost as much signs and wonders like Prophet TB Joshua. He is ridding Urhoboland of the worship of "Olokun and Igbe Dancing" He is killing witches and demons and actually prospering businesses....at least in his many worshippers belief.

As usual I write this to make us all aware of what we have been doing for a while now....belief in only Yoruba Pastors. Won't it be beneficial to us more if we had Faith Tabernacle in Jesse Town or Koko so that  developmnt may be dragged down to the place as it is happening in Mowe Ibafo? There are many Urhobo, Ibo, Ijaw, Kwale, Akwa Ibom etc pastors near you needing you to "believe and receive" God's blessings.....even if you do not want to worship with your fellow Niger Delta Saint Dikeji Miyerijesu Nigeria's First Saint Ordained By God Bishop of the Whole World.