Whenever I hear talk about the US especially by those criticizing Nigeria, I sometimes shake my head. I wonder what bad thing exists in Nigeria that does not or at the least did not happen in the US. I have told people that terrorism, corruption, kidnapping, suicide bombing, mass killing etc are not Hausa or Yoruba words. They aren't even pidgin which means they exist where English was made.
I had once written on facebook 4th September 2012 which I copied here to this blog this yearhttp://theenaofugarablog.blogspot.com/2013/01/of-obama-and-goodluck-ebele-jonathan-by.html about the similarities between Goodluck Ebele Jonathan and Hussain Barrack Obama. Sacrilegious as this might sound, if you read with open mind, you will see my point and at the least acknowledge the logic even if u disagree.
Goodluck Ebele Jonathan famously said of his difficult attempt to make sharp changes in the country, that "there are too many Goliaths". Watching Obama today April 18 2013, at the White House lawn speak on his failed mission to enforce stricter gun control laws, he may not have used these very words but the spirit of exasperation that was in those GEJ GEJ words inundated his speech.
It was supposed to be a no-brainer. If American laws required every car sold to be reported, why cannot the same be done of guns? Boko Haram has killed 4,000 (four thousand) people thus far. since the Sandy hook massacre where about 26 innocent children were slaughtered, over 4000 people have been killed by gun violence in America and still the Goliaths would not allow anything to be done to stem it.
Not to bore you with a long read, the conclusion remains that just like Nigeria, the powers that be (Goliaths) who have benefited from the status quo will never allow change and no Obama or GEJ, despite their best intentions can easily effect these changes and will continue to be blamed for things their democratic authority would never empower them to change.
I will herein post verbatim the very speech of Obama which is just more oratorical than GEJ's though the end product is the same....too many Goliaths. Here is the link for those who want to hear it from the horse's mouth. http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2013/04/17/17798850-obama-condemns-a-shameful-day-for-washington?liteAnd for those who cannot open the link, here is the transcript. We will allow Obama take it from here
"A few months ago, in response to too many tragedies -- including the shootings of a United States Congresswoman, Gabby Giffords, who's here today, and the murder of 20 innocent schoolchildren and their teachers –- this country took up the cause of protecting more of our people from gun violence.
"Families that know unspeakable grief summoned the courage to petition their elected leaders –- not just to honor the memory of their children, but to protect the lives of all our children. And a few minutes ago, a minority in the United States Senate decided it wasn't worth it. They blocked common-sense gun reforms even while these families looked on from the Senate gallery.
"By now, it's well known that 90 percent of the American people support universal background checks that make it harder for a dangerous person to buy a gun. We're talking about convicted felons, people convicted of domestic violence, people with a severe mental illness. Ninety percent of Americans support that idea. Most Americans think that's already the law.
"And a few minutes ago, 90 percent of Democrats in the Senate just voted for that idea. But it's not going to happen because 90 percent of Republicans in the Senate just voted against that idea.
"A majority of senators voted "yes" to protecting more of our citizens with smarter background checks. But by this continuing distortion of Senate rules, a minority was able to block it from moving forward.
"I'm going to speak plainly and honestly about what's happened here because the American people are trying to figure out how can something have 90 percent support and yet not happen. We had a Democrat and a Republican -– both gun owners, both fierce defenders of our Second Amendment, with "A" grades from the NRA -- come together and worked together to write a common-sense compromise on background checks. And I want to thank Joe Manchin and Pat Toomey for their courage in doing that. That was not easy given their traditional strong support for Second Amendment rights.
"As they said, nobody could honestly claim that the package they put together infringed on our Second Amendment rights. All it did was extend the same background check rules that already apply to guns purchased from a dealer to guns purchased at gun shows or over the Internet. So 60 percent of guns are already purchased through a background check system; this would have covered a lot of the guns that are currently outside that system.
"Their legislation showed respect for gun owners, and it showed respect for the victims of gun violence. And Gabby Giffords, by the way, is both -- she's a gun owner and a victim of gun violence. She is a Westerner and a moderate. And she supports these background checks.
"In fact, even the NRA used to support expanded background checks. The current leader of the NRA used to support these background checks. So while this compromise didn't contain everything I wanted or everything that these families wanted, it did represent progress. It represented moderation and common sense. That's why 90 percent of the American people supported it.
"But instead of supporting this compromise, the gun lobby and its allies willfully lied about the bill. They claimed that it would create some sort of "big brother" gun registry, even though the bill did the opposite. This legislation, in fact, outlawed any registry. Plain and simple, right there in the text. But that didn't matter.
"And unfortunately, this pattern of spreading untruths about this legislation served a purpose, because those lies upset an intense minority of gun owners, and that in turn intimidated a lot of senators. And I talked to several of these senators over the past few weeks, and they're all good people. I know all of them were shocked by tragedies like Newtown. And I also understand that they come from states that are strongly pro-gun. And I have consistently said that there are regional differences when it comes to guns, and that both sides have to listen to each other.
"But the fact is most of these senators could not offer any good reason why we wouldn't want to make it harder for criminals and those with severe mental illnesses to buy a gun. There were no coherent arguments as to why we wouldn't do this. It came down to politics -- the worry that that vocal minority of gun owners would come after them in future elections. They worried that the gun lobby would spend a lot of money and paint them as anti-Second Amendment.
"And obviously, a lot of Republicans had that fear, but Democrats had that fear, too. And so they caved to the pressure, and they started looking for an excuse -- any excuse -- to vote "no."
"One common argument I heard was that this legislation wouldn't prevent all future massacres. And that's true. As I said from the start, no single piece of legislation can stop every act of violence and evil. We learned that tragically just two days ago. But if action by Congress could have saved one person, one child, a few hundred, a few thousand -- if it could have prevented those people from losing their lives to gun violence in the future while preserving our Second Amendment rights, we had an obligation to try.
"And this legislation met that test. And too many senators failed theirs.
"I've heard some say that blocking this step would be a victory. And my question is, a victory for who? A victory for what? All that happened today was the preservation of the loophole that lets dangerous criminals buy guns without a background check. That didn't make our kids safer. Victory for not doing something that 90 percent of Americans, 80 percent of Republicans, the vast majority of your constituents wanted to get done? It begs the question, who are we here to represent?
"I've heard folks say that having the families of victims lobby for this legislation was somehow misplaced. "A prop," somebody called them. "Emotional blackmail," some outlet said. Are they serious? Do we really think that thousands of families whose lives have been shattered by gun violence don't have a right to weigh in on this issue? Do we think their emotions, their loss is not relevant to this debate?
"So all in all, this was a pretty shameful day for Washington.
"But this effort is not over. I want to make it clear to the American people we can still bring about meaningful changes that reduce gun violence, so long as the American people don't give up on it. Even without Congress, my administration will keep doing everything it can to protect more of our communities. We're going to address the barriers that prevent states from participating in the existing background check system. We're going to give law enforcement more information about lost and stolen guns so it can do its job. We're going to help to put in place emergency plans to protect our children in their schools.
"But we can do more if Congress gets its act together. And if this Congress refuses to listen to the American people and pass common-sense gun legislation, then the real impact is going to have to come from the voters.
"To all the people who supported this legislation -- law enforcement and responsible gun owners, Democrats and Republicans, urban moms, rural hunters, whoever you are -- you need to let your representatives in Congress know that you are disappointed, and that if they don't act this time, you will remember come election time.
"To the wide majority of NRA households who supported this legislation, you need to let your leadership and lobbyists in Washington know they didn't represent your views on this one.
"The point is those who care deeply about preventing more and more gun violence will have to be as passionate, and as organized, and as vocal as those who blocked these common-sense steps to help keep our kids safe. Ultimately, you outnumber those who argued the other way. But they're better organized. They're better financed. They've been at it longer. And they make sure to stay focused on this one issue during election time. And that's the reason why you can have something that 90 percent of Americans support and you can't get it through the Senate or the House of Representatives.
"So to change Washington, you, the American people, are going to have to sustain some passion about this. And when necessary, you've got to send the right people to Washington. And that requires strength, and it requires persistence.
"And that's the one thing that these families should have inspired in all of us. I still don't know how they have been able to muster up the strength to do what they've doing over the last several weeks, last several months.
"And I see this as just round one. When Newtown happened, I met with these families and I spoke to the community, and I said, something must be different right now. We're going to have to change. That's what the whole country said. Everybody talked about how we were going to change something to make sure this didn't happen again, just like everybody talked about how we needed to do something after Aurora. Everybody talked about we needed change something after Tucson.
"And I'm assuming that the emotions that we've all felt since Newtown, the emotions that we've all felt since Tucson and Aurora and Chicago -- the pain we share with these families and families all across the country who've lost a loved one to gun violence -- I'm assuming that's not a temporary thing. I'm assuming our expressions of grief and our commitment to do something different to prevent these things from happening are not empty words.
"I believe we're going to be able to get this done. Sooner or later, we are going to get this right. The memories of these children demand it. And so do the American people.
"Thank you very much, everybody."
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Friday, April 12, 2013
And Tega Agbosa Cracks our Ribs. hahahaha
Barrister Tega Agbosa had this on his facebook update and invited me on BB to read it. Reading it I immediately knew why he drew my attention. It had the humor that embellishes my writing and I thought it made perfect sense that I share it with those who have grown a taste for what God puts in my head to write.
After reading, pls tell me how come many "Bendel" people are so funny. Let us allow Tega take it from here
"When I first enter Amsterdam, jab occupy person with correct groove and tins, everybody dey form pally sotay I nor even remember contact people wey I been done dey follow yarn small small before I enter the area. Me and the other oyibo people for office dey waka everywhere, chop yama yama wey nor dey ever done. On top say the lem nor done, e nor still dey belleful. True true, butter no be monkey food. And everytime na so the bill dey be gboah!. But wafi nor fit carry last, as oyile dey happy me sef go follow dem praise the food. If no be sense wey man get take arrange egusi and ogbono with one big lylon of G4 plus indomie follow body only God know wetin my eye for see that period. Everytime I reach house like dis my body go dey shake, cold plus alarm. Sharp sharp I don start to boil water, warm soup. When I don lem finish only me go start to provoke, who send me go this waka na? Onojuvwe? As I like mede mede reach, dis one pass my power. Dem nor dey tell person o, small small I start to dislodge. I free dem sharply before agbada go hook barbwire.
As I start to roll solo I remember some people wey I suppose block for here, two southie girls when my other southie friend hook me up with. No be dat kain hook up so comot mind for bad tin. In the land of Oyile all blackman na fellow area. One of their pally sef con join the parole so dem come be three, all from SA. Anyway we generally waka a few times, chop for outside and, as a papa filla I tell dem make dem shucking their money make I pay. Dem first draw rain say dem must pay but we know say all na activity because the "I go pay my own" wey dem dey sing so I no see anybody wey put hand for purse. But at least all of us gree say as Africans make we lem the closest thing to wetin we sabi, so no forming. True true dem correct die. So naturally we dey always arrange to meet like one weekend a month.
Na so we agree to do shacks last weekend. We first go wack, steak and fries, normal. Time to pay I bone, everybody must answer their papa name today. All of dem start to dey ask me how much dem go pay. I put the bill for table say make another person divide am by 4. I sure say dem go dey wonder why I lock up, but like Olamide, I no send. Anyhow anyhow we pay finish come say make we go another joint go high up. Na there yawa gas.
As we siddon dey drink dey gist, suddenly the atmosphere change. I nor fit breathe, I just dey look everybody face dey wonder who mess this mess. Girls dey pretend die. All of dem lock up bone like say nothing dey happen. Why all of dem bone? Shebi na only one person mess the mess? Wetin do the rest nose? I start to look around me so that the innocent among us go know say I innocent before dem go say Naija guys dey troway without human sympathy. Our reputation don kuku sawa, e go too easy to add this to the list. Abi na the guys for my back? Small time the tin pass, we start to breathe normal again. We drink some more, dem dance, we laugh, everybody forget. But the peace nor too tay.
"Gboza!" The person troway another silent killer. Dis time my head turn. All my thinking start to take place in pidgin. I start to breathe only out. Small time I start to sneeze like posy. All dis one so dem still bone. Ah my brain knock! My spirit start to provoke. For my mind I dey voke "If shit dey catch una make una go shit na. If shit nor dey catch una sef make una still go shit, wetin?". I close my eye, close nose close mouth. As I open eye my eye don red, the girl wey near me, the one wey I dey suspect, dey look her phone. Another one come ask me "are you okay?". I nor know when I say "wetin na?" Dem confuse come say "waiting? For what?" I say make dem nor worry. I start to search for mess for my belle, today na today. If dem send dem come meet me we go dig am today, shebi all na oxygen? Ehn lets go there. I start to ginger, kpata kpata we go use mess kill oursef today.
"Gbuyaka!". Before I fit gather my own the person release another one. Omo my belle squeeze, all mess producing facilities for my body shucking. I dey look dem, dey look dem, dey look dem. Dem see say I dey look dem, dem must know why I dey look dem. Yet everybody keep face straight. Ehen? Na so? Okay, no shaking. I get up, waka go stand for corner. Again dem dey look me, me sef start to look dem dey smile because at least I dey breathe better air now. One of dem wey don dey dance since, and the one I suspect less wan waka come meet me like say wetin I dey do there. I raise hand say make she dey where she dey, say I dey come. The other one smile. The last one, the one wey siddon near me still do like say nothing dey happen. Right then she confirm my suspicion, na she wan kill me.
When I suspect say the environment dey safe again I waka go back, say make we pay because I need to go. I turn to the "messer" with straight face tell am say "you for like go kaka sha!". She say "huh" I say "ehn". Nobody talk again. Bill come, we share the money again, pay finish enter road.
The next day one of the "innocent" girls call me say why I switch off come dey speak "Nigerian" yesterday. I tell her hoha say the "pharting on that table was a mind altering experience". She burst laugh say she think say na only her been dey smell am. God knows sha, if dem say make we comot again I go tell dem make dem shit first before dem leave house or I go nowhere, I can't shout!"
After reading, pls tell me how come many "Bendel" people are so funny. Let us allow Tega take it from here
"When I first enter Amsterdam, jab occupy person with correct groove and tins, everybody dey form pally sotay I nor even remember contact people wey I been done dey follow yarn small small before I enter the area. Me and the other oyibo people for office dey waka everywhere, chop yama yama wey nor dey ever done. On top say the lem nor done, e nor still dey belleful. True true, butter no be monkey food. And everytime na so the bill dey be gboah!. But wafi nor fit carry last, as oyile dey happy me sef go follow dem praise the food. If no be sense wey man get take arrange egusi and ogbono with one big lylon of G4 plus indomie follow body only God know wetin my eye for see that period. Everytime I reach house like dis my body go dey shake, cold plus alarm. Sharp sharp I don start to boil water, warm soup. When I don lem finish only me go start to provoke, who send me go this waka na? Onojuvwe? As I like mede mede reach, dis one pass my power. Dem nor dey tell person o, small small I start to dislodge. I free dem sharply before agbada go hook barbwire.
As I start to roll solo I remember some people wey I suppose block for here, two southie girls when my other southie friend hook me up with. No be dat kain hook up so comot mind for bad tin. In the land of Oyile all blackman na fellow area. One of their pally sef con join the parole so dem come be three, all from SA. Anyway we generally waka a few times, chop for outside and, as a papa filla I tell dem make dem shucking their money make I pay. Dem first draw rain say dem must pay but we know say all na activity because the "I go pay my own" wey dem dey sing so I no see anybody wey put hand for purse. But at least all of us gree say as Africans make we lem the closest thing to wetin we sabi, so no forming. True true dem correct die. So naturally we dey always arrange to meet like one weekend a month.
Na so we agree to do shacks last weekend. We first go wack, steak and fries, normal. Time to pay I bone, everybody must answer their papa name today. All of dem start to dey ask me how much dem go pay. I put the bill for table say make another person divide am by 4. I sure say dem go dey wonder why I lock up, but like Olamide, I no send. Anyhow anyhow we pay finish come say make we go another joint go high up. Na there yawa gas.
As we siddon dey drink dey gist, suddenly the atmosphere change. I nor fit breathe, I just dey look everybody face dey wonder who mess this mess. Girls dey pretend die. All of dem lock up bone like say nothing dey happen. Why all of dem bone? Shebi na only one person mess the mess? Wetin do the rest nose? I start to look around me so that the innocent among us go know say I innocent before dem go say Naija guys dey troway without human sympathy. Our reputation don kuku sawa, e go too easy to add this to the list. Abi na the guys for my back? Small time the tin pass, we start to breathe normal again. We drink some more, dem dance, we laugh, everybody forget. But the peace nor too tay.
"Gboza!" The person troway another silent killer. Dis time my head turn. All my thinking start to take place in pidgin. I start to breathe only out. Small time I start to sneeze like posy. All dis one so dem still bone. Ah my brain knock! My spirit start to provoke. For my mind I dey voke "If shit dey catch una make una go shit na. If shit nor dey catch una sef make una still go shit, wetin?". I close my eye, close nose close mouth. As I open eye my eye don red, the girl wey near me, the one wey I dey suspect, dey look her phone. Another one come ask me "are you okay?". I nor know when I say "wetin na?" Dem confuse come say "waiting? For what?" I say make dem nor worry. I start to search for mess for my belle, today na today. If dem send dem come meet me we go dig am today, shebi all na oxygen? Ehn lets go there. I start to ginger, kpata kpata we go use mess kill oursef today.
"Gbuyaka!". Before I fit gather my own the person release another one. Omo my belle squeeze, all mess producing facilities for my body shucking. I dey look dem, dey look dem, dey look dem. Dem see say I dey look dem, dem must know why I dey look dem. Yet everybody keep face straight. Ehen? Na so? Okay, no shaking. I get up, waka go stand for corner. Again dem dey look me, me sef start to look dem dey smile because at least I dey breathe better air now. One of dem wey don dey dance since, and the one I suspect less wan waka come meet me like say wetin I dey do there. I raise hand say make she dey where she dey, say I dey come. The other one smile. The last one, the one wey siddon near me still do like say nothing dey happen. Right then she confirm my suspicion, na she wan kill me.
When I suspect say the environment dey safe again I waka go back, say make we pay because I need to go. I turn to the "messer" with straight face tell am say "you for like go kaka sha!". She say "huh" I say "ehn". Nobody talk again. Bill come, we share the money again, pay finish enter road.
The next day one of the "innocent" girls call me say why I switch off come dey speak "Nigerian" yesterday. I tell her hoha say the "pharting on that table was a mind altering experience". She burst laugh say she think say na only her been dey smell am. God knows sha, if dem say make we comot again I go tell dem make dem shit first before dem leave house or I go nowhere, I can't shout!"
Monday, April 8, 2013
IF I FAT COME BACK FROM THIS AMERICA...The food too much abeg By Ena Ofugara
You never know you are getting fat as a guy. It is girls that are paranoid about their weight that even a lekpa (thin girl) that adds big stones to her bag so the wind will not blow her from Lekki beach to 1004 apartments will be saying "Ena i am getting too fat" Mtchewww! You wish!. For us guys it is clothes that tell us cos we do not spend inordinate times naked in front of the mirror. And even when we do, we usually are admiring something else, telling ourselves that "objects in mirrors are bigger than they appear" And then we rub our stomach and say "evidence of hammer" (wealth)
Okay I was born big (11 kg at birth) but my hyper active "talki talki" play play self lost all the weight. people who remember me from Uniben would describe me as thin. In fact Osemotan Okosun, my blooder, jibed me one day when I said I wanted to carry weights and pick up muscles, he said "Ena, dem no dey turn bone to muscle. Try chop make you fat first". CHAI!!! He discouraged me from becoming Nigeria's Arnold Shwarzenegger with that one "yabis". Semo, let your conscience judge you. lol
Now I am from a very middle-class background so growing up there was as much food at our table as was in any table around us so when I compare eating styles and habits, know it is done with the average family in mind....a little better than average perhaps.
You know how in Nigeria you can eat a big plate of eba and or foofoo/akpu and to see the meat you may have to scuba dive to the bottom of the bowl. And when rice is served even in parties, sometimes two Magi-cube looking object will lie atop the rice and you usually finish the rice before you eat the meat. Yes, we were taught that you should save the best for last. Then as you finish the rice/eba, u drink a big cup of water to fill whatever space that is left. In fact I remember the gist about a guy that said to a "mama put". (food seller)
Customer: "madam give me eight raps of akpu"
Mama Put: "how much meat?"
Customer: "meat at you own risk"
Another version perhaps of that story is
Customer: "madam, give me eight raps of akpu"
Mama: "how much meat?"
"I dey hurry madam. No time to chew the meat. I done late for work"
So with this background i arrived America and I was taken out by Kimberly. As we sat down, they brought a large bowl of chips which is like fried black plantain but it is made of corn and then sauce to dip it in. Then a large bowl of small chicken thighs (at least sixteen). Then leaves fried in oils, tasting like meat (you should try it if you cook) and then wines.
Trust me I attacked the chicken thighs particularly and remembered my manners not to "talk while eating"....well it was so I could really eat as much and as quickly before one friend will come and visit me and reduce my ration (as if na Naija i dey and visitors that know your eating schedule and visit only then)
So having eaten to my fill and belched as silently as i could, the waiter came and said
Waiter: "can I take your order now"
("TAKE MY ORDER OR BILL"?) I wanted to scream and he added
Waiter: "how did you like your appetizer"
Ena:( "APPETIZER???? This many chicken lap naim you dey call appetizer????" But not to "fall my hand" (disgrace myself), "Oh nice. Very filling"
( I started perusing the menu which made little sense to me because i did not know the foods so I asked)
Ena: "So what tastes really good here?"
then the waiter started mentioning different types of meats and saying"well done" "medium rare" etc...things that made even less sense to me. But I am humble so I asked
Ena "what is medium rare"? Is it a rare kind of meat like dinosaur or mammoth" (this na America. the hunters fit dey catch meat from Jurasic park)
Waiter: (The waiter smiles in a kind of embarrased way) "medium rare means half cooked"
Ena: (Chei!!! half-cooked wey kerosine no finish for stove? why people go dey chop half done meat?) Emm. Gimme the Pork ribs on marinade...no.... (I no know wetin marinade mean) in Barbecue sauce.
Waiter: And what two sides do you want?
Ena: Sides? the side of the pork I want to eat? the ribs na. Where there's the "yokoyoko" oil.
Waiter: em...by sides I mean um... cornbread muffins, rice, potatoes, grilled zucchini salad with lemon and scallions...
Ena: Em...(Rice na side abi na rice be the main food? Godabegoooo)
And so the food is served and indeed the rice I ordered was really "the side". It is the meat that is the main food. So unlike Nigeria where you will scoop like ten spoonfuls of rice and cut a lil bit of meat to manage it till the end, here you are eating the meat and then scooping some rice or zucchini to balance the meat.
So greedy me and because the "well done" meat I ordered tasted so good, I began stuffing myself and small water is leaving my eyes from the overfeeding.
Now Kim sees me struggling with the food and she says
Kim: "are you full?"
Ena: (Full wetin? make i leave better well cooked pig for who? No be money dem take buy am????) Not really. (I straighten up, move in my seat to allow more space in my stomach and delve into the meat...sorry food again. I at least finish the meat and as if on cue the waiter brings a large bowl of ice cream and large cake in the center and smiles.
Waiter: Your dessert.
Ena (dessert. hmmm. E get as you go chop only this cake, lick the ice cream, drink one correct cup of water and you done chop correct morning food be that till "eba hour" in the afternoon. I love cakes and ice cream. Living alone, it is something I always get from the mall. But that day I looked at the waiter with hate in my eyes. I wanted to ask him "dessert wetin??? Na so Arab people dey chop for "desert" na im dem thin? No dey call am dessert again. Find name call am" But instead I smile and still greedy me, I scoop some ice cream and after all it is just water. It will find a way to settle to the bottom of my stomach, past the meat and meat and meat and rice etc.
So as the bill is paid and waiter tipped, I walk sluggishly like a cobra that swallowed a full cow and unable to say a word on the way home. As I lay on the bed, food poured right back into my mouth and nose and i ran to the bathroom to retch out the food that I had so greedily engorged myself with
Okay that was high-end feeding. MacDonald has one dollar burgers that would fill u up in seconds. Remember the meat and dough is ground so flat that you dont even chew as it slides down your throat ,making you ingest faster and more as chewing is dispensed with. And the sodas... (no vex, na "soda" dem dey call minerals like fanta coke pepsi etc)... and for a dollar six cents, you are given one large cup and you go to a fountain or dispenser and you fill your coke or sprite from the tap and you can go five hundred tiimes as long as it is the same visit...as in you have not left finally. So you can drink coke till you drown for one dollar 6 cents.
So when you see people that you knew were thin in Nigeria like me put on weight, no, it is not that I now have money. NA LIE. Food is very cheap here and the achievement is not in the weight you are able to put on whereas in Nigeria people will say "your husband/wife dey take care of you oh. see as you come FRESH", here it is staying thin that is expensive.
So if I "rebuuu" or "orobo" come back, no be my fault. BLAME AMERICA
Friday, March 22, 2013
AND ENA OFUGARA IS TESTED FOR DRUGS...America no go kill me!!!
I do not know if it is that funny things find me or I find things funny but what I am about to write about is one of the funniest things that has happened since I got here....okay there have been many funny things but you be the judge.
You know in this country America, igbo (weed) is the starting point. Cigarette that when we see a woman smoking in Nigeria we will say "Mudiare come see!!! that woman dey smoke", Here there is cigarette break and old men, old women, young girls, everybody lights their cigarette. If you see oyibo "Nene" (old woman) puffing here, you will think of Nene back home and wonder the "taba" (tobacco) or the snuff they take with that black spittle/phlegm that comes out and the cigarette which is worse? em...thinking... taba makes their teeth dirty but cigarette ruins the whole atmosphere and many burn themselves down from dozing off while sleeping with Marlboro in their mouths...so which is better?
Yes you do not count cigarette. What you start to count from is "igbo" and Ehidiamen's Colorado and a few states have legalized it....in fact the government of Washington state (different from washington DC where the capital is) is actually calling on people who know how to wrap the igbo, how to grow it, how to remove the seed etc to come forward and teach others. Yes the state says since government cannot stop Americans from smoking weed, try as they may, since so many youths have become "excon" and no longer employable just because they smoked igbo, it is better to legalize it, have everyone who deals in it pay taxes etc. The government is talking about making serious money from the igbo business.
So when I got this new job and we were required to come for the drug test, I had an idea how it goes. During my alcohol and drugs class for my driver's license, I learnt igbo stays in the system for twenty one days...that is if you smoked igbo at second week of February, if you took a drug test by same fabruary, it will show you are an "igbobian". (drug user)
I remember the first time I was scheduled to go last year on my visit to faraway Texas, how my brother Riete Ofugara was looking at me asking if i was sure I would pass the test. I was like "shoo bros, my jaguda no reach igbo side na. shooo" and Riete says "Ena you sure????" and kept staring at me wondering if my closeness to Kwale people have not influenced me his eclectic younger brother. I didn't do that test then and so I guess he will never know for sure till this one.
Okay this test, we are about twenty and straight off the bat, I identify this "igbobian". Yes he wore a tie and shirt and looked nice but his eyes were a little too red and dreamy. So i am watching this dude saying in my mind "why this guy bother come here sef? How he want take pass?"
And then trust the two girls seated next to me. One was a Jamaican from her Buju Banton accent, the other American
"whats you name again" The ugly one who is the Jamaican girl asked me (why na the wowo girls dey start conversation sef? Why not the fine one?')
"I am Ena...it is actually a very long name but everyone calls me Ena"
Jamaican: Ya smoke?
ME: Yes fish. I smoke fish. You use it to drink garri.
Jamaican: Garri? You must be Nigerian. I like Nigerians I have dated quite a few
ME: By few how many?
Jamaican: haha. Buoy you funny. I said a few. haha. Why ya ask me how many?
American fine one: haha. Tanya has dated quite a lot. She wanted to talk to you cos she said you WAS Nigerian.
Jamaican: (To American). Gyal you talk shit. Okay, Nigerian, you smoke weed?
ME: What is weed? (In my mind. "dem send una come? Una be spy abi my village weeeensh???)
Jamaican: Ya know what weed is.Grass
ME: We clear or rather cut grass in my country with ojigbe...you know cutlas...machete
American: He funny. I bet he knows what weed is.
Jamaican: I am talking kaya, Indonesia, sensimila...I know you know.
American: Marijuana
ME: Oh Marijuana? I have seen it on TV. (una papa! Na me una want set up. I jump una pass in Jesus name AMEN!!!)
"Attention everybody" the lady in charge says. "You all must sign the consent form for us to be able to test your urine for drugs and alcohol"
(shoo, booze join? Them no know say cold dey? Them no know say na American ogogoro people dey take face the snow?)
And so we were given forms. Yes O! For everything in this country you must sign a consent form. It is the first time i am seeing consent form to take my piss. Well as long as it is not babalawo's cup I am peeing in (voodoo priest) I will give them as much urine as they want.
After the signing of the forms we were given some magic cup to pee in. And so we went on a line to use the bathroom. we were bodysearched and i did not fully understand why. But my eyes were on this American boy whose eyes were a bit too Don Jazzy-like. He was moving from one foot to the other and clearly uncomfortable.
well I went in peeing the cup, wrote my name on the label and submitted. Don Jazzy look alike made sure he was last and then submitted his cup.
There was no long wait. Right there and then oyibo (white people) simply peeled the label and on it were writings and they started computing it in our presence. and then it happened. The oyibo women started laughing and they called Don Jazzy "who is Mr jeffrey Anderson?"
Jeffrey got up. I knew this would happen. I knew he was an Igbobian
Woman in Charge "Is this your urine? Will you please take this cup and pee for us again? There seems to be a problem with your urine sample. We need to redo it"
Jeffrey: (the Don jazzy guy) I ain't got no pee left. I just peed"
Woman in Charge: em...we will give you some juice or water or soda (na soda dem dey call mineral) and you can take it now and in 30 minutes to an hour you should have enough for us. We are sorry"
Jeffrey: Just tell me what the problem is.
Woman in Charge: em..are you sure?
Jeffrey: yeah. What is it?
Woman in charge: According to this urine analysis, you are pregnant.
(silence then laughter.) It is why we need to retake it.
Jeffrey: shiiiiiiiit!!! dayum!!!! pregnant? She fucking said she was on the fucking pill men. shiiiiit!!!
Woman in Charge: She?
(another round of laughter)
Jeffrey: shiiiit my girl be tryna trick me men. I aint got money for child support. She said she was on the pill and now she pregnant. I ain't going down like that men.
(more laughter)
Woman in Charge: We didn't test her we tested you. You....
Jeffrey: Damn bitch, I ain't no tranvestite. I am a man. How can i be pregnant? It was her pee men. I tried to not smoke but me and my boys went out and I was like I had a job interview but my boys were smoking and i was like i should smoke too. shiiiit. I got her pee men! She didn't fucking tell me she was pregnant. Bitch tryna play me men!!!!.
Woman in Charge:...well..you will have to excuse us. What you did was...
Jeffrey: (Quiet) Men I need this job men! I am on welfare and all.My mom kicked me out that I smoke too much weed. She smokes too. Nobody kicked her out (for her own house?who want kick her out? Oghene biko!)
And then another nonsense happened.
Jeffrey "Hey Nigeria" (I looked around and was wondering who he was talking to) Yes you with the blue tie. (chei na me he dey talk to) Gimme your lighter, I got one last joint i need to smoke men. Bitch be stressing me
Me: Guy, why you want involve me na shoooo! them send you come?
(raucous laughter with "what did he say? what did he say")
Jeffrey: What did you say?
(I put myself together and calmed down)
Me: jeffrey, why do want to do this to me huh? I don't smoke weed.
Jeffrey: I never said you did. I said gimme a light bruv
Woman in Charge: (dips her hand in her jacket and gives him a lighter.) Take it and you can't smoke on the premises and you have to leave us now.
Jeffrey: thanks. My girl crazy i tell ya. (he leaves. Raucous laughter)
Jamaican: Why he ask ya fi light? me tell ya say ya smoke ya say ya na smoke weed.
Me: Listen Patra, (I call her the name of that Jamaican singer) I do not smoke. You guys are like Satans to me right now and i say get thee behind me.
(another bout of laughter)
And so the results are handed to us. The lady in charge kept smiling at me when she gave me the papers. Everyone was staring at me when i got mine and the list of drugs i saw on that paper I have never heard before. just one cup and label peeled off and it revealed that of over forty drugs i was negative for all. Trust me as i raised my paper and said
"um... I am drug-free. I am alcohol free. I do not even take aspirin. I pray when sick and jesus heals me
(raucous laughter) "una dey laugh abi?" i continued in pidgin as i took my seat.
Needless to say i am the most popular guy where I work and they keep asking me
"Hey Nigeria, gimme your light."
So tomorrow the 23rd which is my birthday, I have decided to give all my colleagues lighters.
But where did that guy hide the pee of his girlfriend that a bodysearch did not reveal? Did he keep it in his mouth????? If yes, did she pee in a cup and he drank it or was it direct from source?
America no go kill me.
You know in this country America, igbo (weed) is the starting point. Cigarette that when we see a woman smoking in Nigeria we will say "Mudiare come see!!! that woman dey smoke", Here there is cigarette break and old men, old women, young girls, everybody lights their cigarette. If you see oyibo "Nene" (old woman) puffing here, you will think of Nene back home and wonder the "taba" (tobacco) or the snuff they take with that black spittle/phlegm that comes out and the cigarette which is worse? em...thinking... taba makes their teeth dirty but cigarette ruins the whole atmosphere and many burn themselves down from dozing off while sleeping with Marlboro in their mouths...so which is better?
Yes you do not count cigarette. What you start to count from is "igbo" and Ehidiamen's Colorado and a few states have legalized it....in fact the government of Washington state (different from washington DC where the capital is) is actually calling on people who know how to wrap the igbo, how to grow it, how to remove the seed etc to come forward and teach others. Yes the state says since government cannot stop Americans from smoking weed, try as they may, since so many youths have become "excon" and no longer employable just because they smoked igbo, it is better to legalize it, have everyone who deals in it pay taxes etc. The government is talking about making serious money from the igbo business.
So when I got this new job and we were required to come for the drug test, I had an idea how it goes. During my alcohol and drugs class for my driver's license, I learnt igbo stays in the system for twenty one days...that is if you smoked igbo at second week of February, if you took a drug test by same fabruary, it will show you are an "igbobian". (drug user)
I remember the first time I was scheduled to go last year on my visit to faraway Texas, how my brother Riete Ofugara was looking at me asking if i was sure I would pass the test. I was like "shoo bros, my jaguda no reach igbo side na. shooo" and Riete says "Ena you sure????" and kept staring at me wondering if my closeness to Kwale people have not influenced me his eclectic younger brother. I didn't do that test then and so I guess he will never know for sure till this one.
Okay this test, we are about twenty and straight off the bat, I identify this "igbobian". Yes he wore a tie and shirt and looked nice but his eyes were a little too red and dreamy. So i am watching this dude saying in my mind "why this guy bother come here sef? How he want take pass?"
And then trust the two girls seated next to me. One was a Jamaican from her Buju Banton accent, the other American
"whats you name again" The ugly one who is the Jamaican girl asked me (why na the wowo girls dey start conversation sef? Why not the fine one?')
"I am Ena...it is actually a very long name but everyone calls me Ena"
Jamaican: Ya smoke?
ME: Yes fish. I smoke fish. You use it to drink garri.
Jamaican: Garri? You must be Nigerian. I like Nigerians I have dated quite a few
ME: By few how many?
Jamaican: haha. Buoy you funny. I said a few. haha. Why ya ask me how many?
American fine one: haha. Tanya has dated quite a lot. She wanted to talk to you cos she said you WAS Nigerian.
Jamaican: (To American). Gyal you talk shit. Okay, Nigerian, you smoke weed?
ME: What is weed? (In my mind. "dem send una come? Una be spy abi my village weeeensh???)
Jamaican: Ya know what weed is.Grass
ME: We clear or rather cut grass in my country with ojigbe...you know cutlas...machete
American: He funny. I bet he knows what weed is.
Jamaican: I am talking kaya, Indonesia, sensimila...I know you know.
American: Marijuana
ME: Oh Marijuana? I have seen it on TV. (una papa! Na me una want set up. I jump una pass in Jesus name AMEN!!!)
"Attention everybody" the lady in charge says. "You all must sign the consent form for us to be able to test your urine for drugs and alcohol"
(shoo, booze join? Them no know say cold dey? Them no know say na American ogogoro people dey take face the snow?)
And so we were given forms. Yes O! For everything in this country you must sign a consent form. It is the first time i am seeing consent form to take my piss. Well as long as it is not babalawo's cup I am peeing in (voodoo priest) I will give them as much urine as they want.
After the signing of the forms we were given some magic cup to pee in. And so we went on a line to use the bathroom. we were bodysearched and i did not fully understand why. But my eyes were on this American boy whose eyes were a bit too Don Jazzy-like. He was moving from one foot to the other and clearly uncomfortable.
well I went in peeing the cup, wrote my name on the label and submitted. Don Jazzy look alike made sure he was last and then submitted his cup.
There was no long wait. Right there and then oyibo (white people) simply peeled the label and on it were writings and they started computing it in our presence. and then it happened. The oyibo women started laughing and they called Don Jazzy "who is Mr jeffrey Anderson?"
Jeffrey got up. I knew this would happen. I knew he was an Igbobian
Woman in Charge "Is this your urine? Will you please take this cup and pee for us again? There seems to be a problem with your urine sample. We need to redo it"
Jeffrey: (the Don jazzy guy) I ain't got no pee left. I just peed"
Woman in Charge: em...we will give you some juice or water or soda (na soda dem dey call mineral) and you can take it now and in 30 minutes to an hour you should have enough for us. We are sorry"
Jeffrey: Just tell me what the problem is.
Woman in Charge: em..are you sure?
Jeffrey: yeah. What is it?
Woman in charge: According to this urine analysis, you are pregnant.
(silence then laughter.) It is why we need to retake it.
Jeffrey: shiiiiiiiit!!! dayum!!!! pregnant? She fucking said she was on the fucking pill men. shiiiiit!!!
Woman in Charge: She?
(another round of laughter)
Jeffrey: shiiiit my girl be tryna trick me men. I aint got money for child support. She said she was on the pill and now she pregnant. I ain't going down like that men.
(more laughter)
Woman in Charge: We didn't test her we tested you. You....
Jeffrey: Damn bitch, I ain't no tranvestite. I am a man. How can i be pregnant? It was her pee men. I tried to not smoke but me and my boys went out and I was like I had a job interview but my boys were smoking and i was like i should smoke too. shiiiit. I got her pee men! She didn't fucking tell me she was pregnant. Bitch tryna play me men!!!!.
Woman in Charge:...well..you will have to excuse us. What you did was...
Jeffrey: (Quiet) Men I need this job men! I am on welfare and all.My mom kicked me out that I smoke too much weed. She smokes too. Nobody kicked her out (for her own house?who want kick her out? Oghene biko!)
And then another nonsense happened.
Jeffrey "Hey Nigeria" (I looked around and was wondering who he was talking to) Yes you with the blue tie. (chei na me he dey talk to) Gimme your lighter, I got one last joint i need to smoke men. Bitch be stressing me
Me: Guy, why you want involve me na shoooo! them send you come?
(raucous laughter with "what did he say? what did he say")
Jeffrey: What did you say?
(I put myself together and calmed down)
Me: jeffrey, why do want to do this to me huh? I don't smoke weed.
Jeffrey: I never said you did. I said gimme a light bruv
Woman in Charge: (dips her hand in her jacket and gives him a lighter.) Take it and you can't smoke on the premises and you have to leave us now.
Jeffrey: thanks. My girl crazy i tell ya. (he leaves. Raucous laughter)
Jamaican: Why he ask ya fi light? me tell ya say ya smoke ya say ya na smoke weed.
Me: Listen Patra, (I call her the name of that Jamaican singer) I do not smoke. You guys are like Satans to me right now and i say get thee behind me.
(another bout of laughter)
And so the results are handed to us. The lady in charge kept smiling at me when she gave me the papers. Everyone was staring at me when i got mine and the list of drugs i saw on that paper I have never heard before. just one cup and label peeled off and it revealed that of over forty drugs i was negative for all. Trust me as i raised my paper and said
"um... I am drug-free. I am alcohol free. I do not even take aspirin. I pray when sick and jesus heals me
(raucous laughter) "una dey laugh abi?" i continued in pidgin as i took my seat.
Needless to say i am the most popular guy where I work and they keep asking me
"Hey Nigeria, gimme your light."
So tomorrow the 23rd which is my birthday, I have decided to give all my colleagues lighters.
But where did that guy hide the pee of his girlfriend that a bodysearch did not reveal? Did he keep it in his mouth????? If yes, did she pee in a cup and he drank it or was it direct from source?
America no go kill me.
Thursday, March 21, 2013
IF THERE WAS ANYONE DESERVING OF STATE PARDON by ENA OFUGARA
On Alamieseigha's pardon. Doyin Okupe must be secretly reading me on facebook. Words like "pardon is for criminals not saints" are straight from my arsenal. or well...maybe not.maybe it is just the clear truth in the statement that should come to be obvious to everyone but it is not.
This is not about GEJ and the fact that what other past presidents in Nigeria did and got no mention, if he attempts it, he is put to the sword. I will also not call the many criminals who have emptied public coffers like Atiku who was mentioned in criminal cases in the US yet will likely rule Nigeria ceteris paribus after GEJ. I will not mention that it seems only Niger delta top-shots get convicted e.g Cecilia ibru when over six banks were taken over and billions poured in to save the common man and the banking industry. i will not also point out that while Opia of OMPADEC is on the run Buhari of PTF is contesting for president when both organizations they headed are accused of serious fraud. Why should i bother to talk about Umaru Dikko and how he walks free today? Why should i mention Tinubu and the rest? Why should i mention that Joshua Dariye is today in the Seanate despite many accusations of theft? No I will not. Neither will i remind yet again that El Rufai and Ribadu ran away in a democracy from a sick Yar'Adua when it was obvious that they were to face prosecution by the courts of the land. What innocent person runs from the courts in a democracy?
No I will not mention it because it is an abberration that they are not in prison. It is beyond reason that they have not been made to return loots. It beggars belief that Atiku, after the Mrs Douglas (or was it Graham) conviction in the US on evidence that implicates Atiku, he remains a forerunner for the seat of President of Nigeria.
I also refuse to argue that since it is only the South Southerners that seem to be "imprisonable" we must ask that we too be free. NO. I ask that everyone fraudulent be locked up.
So what about the Alamieseigha case? I go back to quote Doyin Okupe and the reason given by GEJ in exercising his constitutionally bestowed power of pardon. Hear Okupe
" his (Alamieseigha's) political and stabilising influence in that region (Niger Delta) have impacted positively on the overall economy of the nation, bringing crude oil exports from the abysmally low level of 700,00 bpd to over 2.4 million bpd.
Therefore, it is obvious that Alamieyeseigha has been a major player since his release from prison in ensuring that the blood that runs through the Nigerian economic artery is not cut off.”
he goes further
"“He lost his position, forfeited the property illegally acquired and has demonstrated enough soberness after he served his sentence."
Also he says of pardon granted Awolowo for which nobody complained
"“In Nigerian history, great and eminent men, who have been crucified for one crime or the other have been pardoned by past Presidents and such men have lived thereafter to further enhance our political and socio-economic development. Amongst those are our respected departed sage, Chief Obafemi Awolowo and the revered Ikemba Nnewi, Chief Odumegwu Ojukwu, who continued after their pardon to contribute immensely to Nigeria’s social, political and economic growth till death."
Now for those who continue to lambast the pardon, can we do the math and check how much he stole and which has been recovered, then how much Nigeria has made from his stabilizing of the Niger Delta and increasing Nigeria's oil production? What is the difference between 700,00 bpd to over 2.4 million bpd. Does anybody know how many billions his actions have given Nigeria
Again, how many people would have been killed and kidnapped if the amnesty initiative had failed without him? Remember the militants answer only to Ibori and Alamieseigha. So with Ibori subversive action against GEJ which in one instant made the militants to body-search a Vice president, and totally humiliate him when he went to visit "Camp 5"? But for Alamieseigha who would have calmed them down? Oh maybe GEJ should like Obasanjo send planes and drop bombs on Nigerians whose oil you steal and steal and steal?
Now a man who was "Obj magomagoically" removed from the post of governor his people voted him into and which grants him immunity till his tenure ends, A man who was disgraced as he ran from London dressed as a woman, a man who went to jail, A man who willingly gave back the stolen/illgotten property...and that man still came out and is enabling Nigeria to be peaceful
Now you all screaming blue murder, you have no idea how important Alamieseigha is in the political equation. Let me educate you. Imagine if the militants were still operating and hausas killed the Ijaws they killed including EK Clarke's ward. Now try and think how many Hausas in Hausa quarters Warri and in the offices in Chevron and Shell and mobil and in NNPC and their staff quarters all over the South South, imagine the numbers that would have died from reprisal attacks and then Hausa will attack and on and on, and this is not happening because a certain Alamieseigha has a vice-grip on these boys.
Again imagine the difference in moneys between 700,00 BPD (barrels per day) and 2.4 million (Over 3 times our daily earnings) why should anyone with good conscience not want him pardoned?
Criminals who are able to redeem themselves and be of service must be rewarded and if any of you do not think this is true, then it is better we close the prisons and shoot all those convicted. What is the point of sending people to jail if it is not for rehabilitation and those who are rehabilated and now an asset to society, pardoned and even honored? Should we name all such people? Oh Awo, Ojukwu etc. I have called them before. How about Don Kings the boxing promoter that gave us Ali and Larry Holmes and Tyson? The list is endless. Many reformed prisoners work in the slums and are doing great things for humanity.
IF THERE IS ANYONE DESERVING OF STATE PARDON, THEN IT IS ALAMIESEIGHA FOR HIS ROLE IN THE NIGER DELTA AND NIGERIAAND THE WORLD FOR THE NIGER DELTA AFFECTS GLOBAL PRICES AND THIS MAN IS THE PEACE.
This is not about GEJ and the fact that what other past presidents in Nigeria did and got no mention, if he attempts it, he is put to the sword. I will also not call the many criminals who have emptied public coffers like Atiku who was mentioned in criminal cases in the US yet will likely rule Nigeria ceteris paribus after GEJ. I will not mention that it seems only Niger delta top-shots get convicted e.g Cecilia ibru when over six banks were taken over and billions poured in to save the common man and the banking industry. i will not also point out that while Opia of OMPADEC is on the run Buhari of PTF is contesting for president when both organizations they headed are accused of serious fraud. Why should i bother to talk about Umaru Dikko and how he walks free today? Why should i mention Tinubu and the rest? Why should i mention that Joshua Dariye is today in the Seanate despite many accusations of theft? No I will not. Neither will i remind yet again that El Rufai and Ribadu ran away in a democracy from a sick Yar'Adua when it was obvious that they were to face prosecution by the courts of the land. What innocent person runs from the courts in a democracy?
No I will not mention it because it is an abberration that they are not in prison. It is beyond reason that they have not been made to return loots. It beggars belief that Atiku, after the Mrs Douglas (or was it Graham) conviction in the US on evidence that implicates Atiku, he remains a forerunner for the seat of President of Nigeria.
I also refuse to argue that since it is only the South Southerners that seem to be "imprisonable" we must ask that we too be free. NO. I ask that everyone fraudulent be locked up.
So what about the Alamieseigha case? I go back to quote Doyin Okupe and the reason given by GEJ in exercising his constitutionally bestowed power of pardon. Hear Okupe
" his (Alamieseigha's) political and stabilising influence in that region (Niger Delta) have impacted positively on the overall economy of the nation, bringing crude oil exports from the abysmally low level of 700,00 bpd to over 2.4 million bpd.
Therefore, it is obvious that Alamieyeseigha has been a major player since his release from prison in ensuring that the blood that runs through the Nigerian economic artery is not cut off.”
he goes further
"“He lost his position, forfeited the property illegally acquired and has demonstrated enough soberness after he served his sentence."
Also he says of pardon granted Awolowo for which nobody complained
"“In Nigerian history, great and eminent men, who have been crucified for one crime or the other have been pardoned by past Presidents and such men have lived thereafter to further enhance our political and socio-economic development. Amongst those are our respected departed sage, Chief Obafemi Awolowo and the revered Ikemba Nnewi, Chief Odumegwu Ojukwu, who continued after their pardon to contribute immensely to Nigeria’s social, political and economic growth till death."
Now for those who continue to lambast the pardon, can we do the math and check how much he stole and which has been recovered, then how much Nigeria has made from his stabilizing of the Niger Delta and increasing Nigeria's oil production? What is the difference between 700,00 bpd to over 2.4 million bpd. Does anybody know how many billions his actions have given Nigeria
Again, how many people would have been killed and kidnapped if the amnesty initiative had failed without him? Remember the militants answer only to Ibori and Alamieseigha. So with Ibori subversive action against GEJ which in one instant made the militants to body-search a Vice president, and totally humiliate him when he went to visit "Camp 5"? But for Alamieseigha who would have calmed them down? Oh maybe GEJ should like Obasanjo send planes and drop bombs on Nigerians whose oil you steal and steal and steal?
Now a man who was "Obj magomagoically" removed from the post of governor his people voted him into and which grants him immunity till his tenure ends, A man who was disgraced as he ran from London dressed as a woman, a man who went to jail, A man who willingly gave back the stolen/illgotten property...and that man still came out and is enabling Nigeria to be peaceful
Now you all screaming blue murder, you have no idea how important Alamieseigha is in the political equation. Let me educate you. Imagine if the militants were still operating and hausas killed the Ijaws they killed including EK Clarke's ward. Now try and think how many Hausas in Hausa quarters Warri and in the offices in Chevron and Shell and mobil and in NNPC and their staff quarters all over the South South, imagine the numbers that would have died from reprisal attacks and then Hausa will attack and on and on, and this is not happening because a certain Alamieseigha has a vice-grip on these boys.
Again imagine the difference in moneys between 700,00 BPD (barrels per day) and 2.4 million (Over 3 times our daily earnings) why should anyone with good conscience not want him pardoned?
Criminals who are able to redeem themselves and be of service must be rewarded and if any of you do not think this is true, then it is better we close the prisons and shoot all those convicted. What is the point of sending people to jail if it is not for rehabilitation and those who are rehabilated and now an asset to society, pardoned and even honored? Should we name all such people? Oh Awo, Ojukwu etc. I have called them before. How about Don Kings the boxing promoter that gave us Ali and Larry Holmes and Tyson? The list is endless. Many reformed prisoners work in the slums and are doing great things for humanity.
IF THERE IS ANYONE DESERVING OF STATE PARDON, THEN IT IS ALAMIESEIGHA FOR HIS ROLE IN THE NIGER DELTA AND NIGERIAAND THE WORLD FOR THE NIGER DELTA AFFECTS GLOBAL PRICES AND THIS MAN IS THE PEACE.
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
AS THE CHURCH BUILT ON PETER PICKS A POPE By ENA OFUGARA
AS THE CHURCH BUILT ON PETER PICKS A POPE
The biggest miracle of this generation continues to be just how powerful the Pope and the Vatican is. Considering just how much religion has been relegated to the background, where schools are sharing condoms to teenagers but are legally banned from saying the Lord's prayer or giving out Bibles, makes it more amazing. Seriously a lecturer that strips naked in class at worst will be said to have had a "meltdown" but any teacher who add "Jesus" to his math or chemistry class, even if it is in reference to turning water to wine in a chemistry class, if it does not disparage the miracle, that teacher will most likely lose his or her job. Pictures of Jesus and a Mary with a halo around their heads have been pulled down in all public schools. A group of cheerleaders that decided to make Christian songs their routine was sued by a few parents and community members while a picture of Jesus that has hung in another school for decades was almost brought down if the school authority had not argued that it was "artistically and historically symbolic and not religious. There are organizations that exist to ensure that suits are brought against such public organizations that dares mention Jesus or God. Indeed you can have posters of naked women and the cheer leaderscan sing about sex but not about God.
What I can never understand is how an America and a Europe that was formed and flourished on Christianity decided arbitrarily that it was time to give God the pink slip I do not know. My friend Edwin Dico would say END TIMES.
With all the assault on everything God, the Pope continues to be huge. I do not get it at all. When Pope John Paul 11 died, over four former American Presidents....Democratic and Republican knelt down at the side of his dead body. These are people who require nothing of the world anymre. Their political career is over. A few of them are not even Catholic. The vatican even trimmed them down to eight or so with their wives AND THEY KNELT. The most powerful people in the world knelt for a dead pope.
And again, yes. The Popes views continue to be powerful... though sometimes antediluvian. People will use a condom. Women and will commit abortion. Men will marry men and women women. But doess it not feel good that there still is a "representative of God" that reminds us that a few things still displeases the creator?
Now I can hear all the criticisms you are about to level against the Catholic Church. Yes they did the crusades and burnt witches. Yes a few popes had sons and plundered the church treasury. yes they burnt women and men for the flimsiest reasons including that they were witches. Yes they made chairs of nails and said it was to give u salvation or something. Yes a lot of homosexuals and misogynists who so as not be forced to marry, find the priesthood a refuge and have continued in their very nefarious and despicable act of sleeping with little boys and girls. yes the Church did try and still does try to cover the sins and secretly make payments to little children whose rectums have been assailed. Yes there is great fraud and embezzlement as the Vatican is stupendously rich and yes the pope blessed Hitler for a promise not to attack the Vatican.
I am certain you have a lot more dung to throw at the catholic church and the Pope. I am sure you have the record of the many sins that happened at santa Fe and other places. But we all forget one minute detail that is yet so powerful, THE CHURCH WAS BUILT ON PETER.
Why don't we study Peter for a while and then closely compare with the Catholic Church and see indeed Jesus did not build his church on Peter.
PETER DIDN'T GO IT ALONE
Peter was a Fisherman. On his own he did not catch any fish. Then Jesus met him and the fish he caught he could not handle alone. Today the Catholic church cannot have gotten this powerful, this strong without God. And yes like others had to help Peter, some other great churches have also helped to rein in the net with the fish. So to Catholics who sneer at other churches....Peter could not take care of all the fish himself. (Luke 5:6)
PETER WAS VIOLENT
Jehovah Witnesses spend so much time just criticising the Catholic Church on their warlike stance. Does anyone remember that a certain disciple caught off the ear of the High Priests servant? Do you know the amount of readiness to fight that it takes to strike even as you are surrounded by Romans fearing a Jewish revolution from a "Messiah"? Do you know what 30 pieces of silver was worth and how planned the attack on Jesus must have been and the sheer numbers...yet Peter struck. In fact, while jesus was preaching peace and love and forgiveness, Peter was ready for any "cassala". John 18:10 "Then Simon Peter, WHO HAD A SWORD, drew it and struck the high priest's servant, cutting off his right ear." Peter did not go looking for a sword, nor did he snatch it from anyone. HE WAS ARMED THE WHOLE TIME HE WAS WITH CHRIST.
The catholic Church and their Crusades are today frowned on by history. But is that not the violence that was in Peter and yet the church was built upon him? Now here is the sweet part. Jesus stopped him and healed the Servant Malchus. Now has the Catholic church not been trying to heal the wounds she has caused and then some? Is there anyone who has today preached more peace than the Pope? In fact the Pope invited all religious leaders, from Imams to Krishna Monks and they all prayed to their gods and then they met and discussed world peace and they still do. Yes Peter BECAME peaceful just as the Catholic Church has BECOME peaceful.
PETER DID WHAT HE HAD TO SO AS TO SURVIVE
Before we criticise the Pope for "blessing" Adolph Hitler, be aware that Peter, seeing that there was no way he could fight the Roman with their superior weapons of war and since the Jewish leadership was in cahoots with them, he had to seek his survival SO HE CAN FIGHT ANOTHER DAY. And so Peter denied Jesus three times AS JESUS PREDICTED.
For those who may not know, Mussolini the Italian Fascist leader and the Nazist Totalitarian Hitler were toether the strongest forceinall of Europe.But for American intervention and the Russian cold, Africa would be a farm for the racist Adolph Hitler. There would be no jews on the planet etc. The Vatican like Peter against the Roman army stood no chance and so she did the unthinkable JUST LIKE PETER. And did they both live to fight another day? YES. Are they both relevant till today? Of course yes.
PETER MADE VOWS HE COULD NOT KEEP.
"Truly I tell you," Jesus answered, "this very night, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times."
But Peter declared, "Even if I have to die with you, I will never disown you."
Now does this not remind you of the vows of the priests and how they break it?
But you have to understand Peter and a large percentage of the priests. Peter was zealous. He wanted to worship God. When he made the statement that he would NEVEr disown Christ, he meant it, just like the father that slept with that widow etc. You have all either read or saw the miniseries "Thornbird". That is exactly what sinning priests go through....a desire to serve God and a weakness of the flesh.
IS ABSTINENCE NOT AS BIG A MIRACLE AS WALKING ON WATER?
Indeed it is. Like Peter did walking on water, many priests actually are able to abstain while others like Peter, at the halfway point they lost the faith and begin to sink in wetness (couldn't resist the pun). Few are able to say "Jesus save me".
PETERS WAYS WERE NEVER CRITICISM-FREE even as he parleyed with the gentiles....From Paul
Galatians 2:11-16 tells how Paul the Evangelist (to me the Protestants and Pentecostal) criticized Peter. Peter parleyed with the gentiles as easily as the Pope parleys with world leaders....to the criticism of many.
PAUL MADE ALL THE NOISE YET IT IS TO PETER THE GREATEST VISION WAS SHOWN, the message that makes the whole world able to be called "Children of God" Acts 10:1-11:18 is the greatest vision in the whole Bible after Isaiah's "unto us a child is born" vision. It is that vision that is Christianity as opposed to Judaism. It is what declared the whole world "clean". I do not remove from Paul. I only show Jesus was/is no liar for "Upon this Rock (Peter) will I build my church)
THE ONLY REAL DAMAGE THE CATHOLIC CHURCH DOES TO CHRISTIANITY
"Let no man call you father, for you have just one father in heaven" I guess Jesus knew exactly what he was saying. Jesus knew that people would take advantage of the appelation or title "father". He spent his time showing that even his mother Mary was nt special. It is not because he did not honour his mother....a woman that sped up his ministry by forcing him to turn water to wine, but so people may not take whatever Mary does with her life and ascribe it to God. Yes Jesus understood the need for a leader and made Peter one. He did not take all the disciples for the transfiguration so he wanted us to have leaders. However he never wanted those laders to be "representative of God on earth" He didnt want some demi-gods in some distant parishes sleeping with children using the toga "father". He didnt want all those corrupt popes to be regarded as "Representative of God". He knew someday a pope may resign and threaten Christendom with all the scandals
So as you read the many attacks on the Catholic church, seeking to rubbish "God's representative on earth" know this "For ALL have sinned and come short of the glory of the lord".Romans 3:23 And also "our righteousness is but as filthy rags" (even while wearing a priests clothes) Isaiah 64:6 and that it is GRACE and that the Pope also is using that grace as ALL HAVE SINNED. So FORGIVE THE FATHER FOR HE HAS SINNED
As the World gathers in Saint Peter Square waiting to see their new pope, we continue to be grateful to the catholic church for their role in converting and educating half the world and their unparalleled showing of Charity to all of humanity and may the Cardinals choose a better Pope this time.
(And thanking my Baptist Deaconess mom for making us attend SUNBEAM which is a Baptist pre-teen church organization that made us know the Bible a bit today enough to appreciate Peter and his church)
So as white smoke appears, as the Pope will appear from
The biggest miracle of this generation continues to be just how powerful the Pope and the Vatican is. Considering just how much religion has been relegated to the background, where schools are sharing condoms to teenagers but are legally banned from saying the Lord's prayer or giving out Bibles, makes it more amazing. Seriously a lecturer that strips naked in class at worst will be said to have had a "meltdown" but any teacher who add "Jesus" to his math or chemistry class, even if it is in reference to turning water to wine in a chemistry class, if it does not disparage the miracle, that teacher will most likely lose his or her job. Pictures of Jesus and a Mary with a halo around their heads have been pulled down in all public schools. A group of cheerleaders that decided to make Christian songs their routine was sued by a few parents and community members while a picture of Jesus that has hung in another school for decades was almost brought down if the school authority had not argued that it was "artistically and historically symbolic and not religious. There are organizations that exist to ensure that suits are brought against such public organizations that dares mention Jesus or God. Indeed you can have posters of naked women and the cheer leaderscan sing about sex but not about God.
What I can never understand is how an America and a Europe that was formed and flourished on Christianity decided arbitrarily that it was time to give God the pink slip I do not know. My friend Edwin Dico would say END TIMES.
With all the assault on everything God, the Pope continues to be huge. I do not get it at all. When Pope John Paul 11 died, over four former American Presidents....Democratic and Republican knelt down at the side of his dead body. These are people who require nothing of the world anymre. Their political career is over. A few of them are not even Catholic. The vatican even trimmed them down to eight or so with their wives AND THEY KNELT. The most powerful people in the world knelt for a dead pope.
And again, yes. The Popes views continue to be powerful... though sometimes antediluvian. People will use a condom. Women and will commit abortion. Men will marry men and women women. But doess it not feel good that there still is a "representative of God" that reminds us that a few things still displeases the creator?
Now I can hear all the criticisms you are about to level against the Catholic Church. Yes they did the crusades and burnt witches. Yes a few popes had sons and plundered the church treasury. yes they burnt women and men for the flimsiest reasons including that they were witches. Yes they made chairs of nails and said it was to give u salvation or something. Yes a lot of homosexuals and misogynists who so as not be forced to marry, find the priesthood a refuge and have continued in their very nefarious and despicable act of sleeping with little boys and girls. yes the Church did try and still does try to cover the sins and secretly make payments to little children whose rectums have been assailed. Yes there is great fraud and embezzlement as the Vatican is stupendously rich and yes the pope blessed Hitler for a promise not to attack the Vatican.
I am certain you have a lot more dung to throw at the catholic church and the Pope. I am sure you have the record of the many sins that happened at santa Fe and other places. But we all forget one minute detail that is yet so powerful, THE CHURCH WAS BUILT ON PETER.
Why don't we study Peter for a while and then closely compare with the Catholic Church and see indeed Jesus did not build his church on Peter.
PETER DIDN'T GO IT ALONE
Peter was a Fisherman. On his own he did not catch any fish. Then Jesus met him and the fish he caught he could not handle alone. Today the Catholic church cannot have gotten this powerful, this strong without God. And yes like others had to help Peter, some other great churches have also helped to rein in the net with the fish. So to Catholics who sneer at other churches....Peter could not take care of all the fish himself. (Luke 5:6)
PETER WAS VIOLENT
Jehovah Witnesses spend so much time just criticising the Catholic Church on their warlike stance. Does anyone remember that a certain disciple caught off the ear of the High Priests servant? Do you know the amount of readiness to fight that it takes to strike even as you are surrounded by Romans fearing a Jewish revolution from a "Messiah"? Do you know what 30 pieces of silver was worth and how planned the attack on Jesus must have been and the sheer numbers...yet Peter struck. In fact, while jesus was preaching peace and love and forgiveness, Peter was ready for any "cassala". John 18:10 "Then Simon Peter, WHO HAD A SWORD, drew it and struck the high priest's servant, cutting off his right ear." Peter did not go looking for a sword, nor did he snatch it from anyone. HE WAS ARMED THE WHOLE TIME HE WAS WITH CHRIST.
The catholic Church and their Crusades are today frowned on by history. But is that not the violence that was in Peter and yet the church was built upon him? Now here is the sweet part. Jesus stopped him and healed the Servant Malchus. Now has the Catholic church not been trying to heal the wounds she has caused and then some? Is there anyone who has today preached more peace than the Pope? In fact the Pope invited all religious leaders, from Imams to Krishna Monks and they all prayed to their gods and then they met and discussed world peace and they still do. Yes Peter BECAME peaceful just as the Catholic Church has BECOME peaceful.
PETER DID WHAT HE HAD TO SO AS TO SURVIVE
Before we criticise the Pope for "blessing" Adolph Hitler, be aware that Peter, seeing that there was no way he could fight the Roman with their superior weapons of war and since the Jewish leadership was in cahoots with them, he had to seek his survival SO HE CAN FIGHT ANOTHER DAY. And so Peter denied Jesus three times AS JESUS PREDICTED.
For those who may not know, Mussolini the Italian Fascist leader and the Nazist Totalitarian Hitler were toether the strongest forceinall of Europe.But for American intervention and the Russian cold, Africa would be a farm for the racist Adolph Hitler. There would be no jews on the planet etc. The Vatican like Peter against the Roman army stood no chance and so she did the unthinkable JUST LIKE PETER. And did they both live to fight another day? YES. Are they both relevant till today? Of course yes.
PETER MADE VOWS HE COULD NOT KEEP.
"Truly I tell you," Jesus answered, "this very night, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times."
But Peter declared, "Even if I have to die with you, I will never disown you."
Now does this not remind you of the vows of the priests and how they break it?
But you have to understand Peter and a large percentage of the priests. Peter was zealous. He wanted to worship God. When he made the statement that he would NEVEr disown Christ, he meant it, just like the father that slept with that widow etc. You have all either read or saw the miniseries "Thornbird". That is exactly what sinning priests go through....a desire to serve God and a weakness of the flesh.
IS ABSTINENCE NOT AS BIG A MIRACLE AS WALKING ON WATER?
Indeed it is. Like Peter did walking on water, many priests actually are able to abstain while others like Peter, at the halfway point they lost the faith and begin to sink in wetness (couldn't resist the pun). Few are able to say "Jesus save me".
PETERS WAYS WERE NEVER CRITICISM-FREE even as he parleyed with the gentiles....From Paul
Galatians 2:11-16 tells how Paul the Evangelist (to me the Protestants and Pentecostal) criticized Peter. Peter parleyed with the gentiles as easily as the Pope parleys with world leaders....to the criticism of many.
PAUL MADE ALL THE NOISE YET IT IS TO PETER THE GREATEST VISION WAS SHOWN, the message that makes the whole world able to be called "Children of God" Acts 10:1-11:18 is the greatest vision in the whole Bible after Isaiah's "unto us a child is born" vision. It is that vision that is Christianity as opposed to Judaism. It is what declared the whole world "clean". I do not remove from Paul. I only show Jesus was/is no liar for "Upon this Rock (Peter) will I build my church)
THE ONLY REAL DAMAGE THE CATHOLIC CHURCH DOES TO CHRISTIANITY
"Let no man call you father, for you have just one father in heaven" I guess Jesus knew exactly what he was saying. Jesus knew that people would take advantage of the appelation or title "father". He spent his time showing that even his mother Mary was nt special. It is not because he did not honour his mother....a woman that sped up his ministry by forcing him to turn water to wine, but so people may not take whatever Mary does with her life and ascribe it to God. Yes Jesus understood the need for a leader and made Peter one. He did not take all the disciples for the transfiguration so he wanted us to have leaders. However he never wanted those laders to be "representative of God on earth" He didnt want some demi-gods in some distant parishes sleeping with children using the toga "father". He didnt want all those corrupt popes to be regarded as "Representative of God". He knew someday a pope may resign and threaten Christendom with all the scandals
So as you read the many attacks on the Catholic church, seeking to rubbish "God's representative on earth" know this "For ALL have sinned and come short of the glory of the lord".Romans 3:23 And also "our righteousness is but as filthy rags" (even while wearing a priests clothes) Isaiah 64:6 and that it is GRACE and that the Pope also is using that grace as ALL HAVE SINNED. So FORGIVE THE FATHER FOR HE HAS SINNED
As the World gathers in Saint Peter Square waiting to see their new pope, we continue to be grateful to the catholic church for their role in converting and educating half the world and their unparalleled showing of Charity to all of humanity and may the Cardinals choose a better Pope this time.
(And thanking my Baptist Deaconess mom for making us attend SUNBEAM which is a Baptist pre-teen church organization that made us know the Bible a bit today enough to appreciate Peter and his church)
So as white smoke appears, as the Pope will appear from
Sunday, March 10, 2013
WILL ALL THOSE WHOSE LAND HAVE OIL PLEASE STAND UP... and will the just stand with them? BY ENA OFUGARA
Do I need to iterate all the wrongs done to the Niger-Delta? Do I need to itemize each theft of what is ours even before Obasanjo's "all lands belong to the Federal Govt" decree which not only stole the lands of the Niger Deltans.....often using the police and army to displace communities and violate lands their parents, brothers and sisters, children were buried in....live in? Do I need to say how her very source of livelihood...fishing and water which she drinks and bathes in is today polluted and no longer drinkable but still being drank? Do I need to remind how time and again Nigerian war planes and soldiers have dropped bombs and brought carnage and death to a people whose crime is that God blessed (cursed) their soil with oil? Does it matter to you that the planes and guns and boots and knives used by the soldiers was bought with the very money from the oil from underneath their soil?
How does it feel to know that while Abuja and Lagos and other places have been developed by the proceeds from the oil, and not that the communities lose nothing but instead you not only take their oil, giving back nothing, you kill the plants and water and very life of that community...how does it make us all feel? And we went to church on Sunday and Mosque on Friday and the shrine everyday inbetween. What does it make us as a people who claim to worship a just God?
Do I need to share what Barr. Kemi Ajayi shared on my facebook wall about how ELF and the French in connivance with our leaders did evil business in the Niger Delta? Do you need to read this link http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2290904/Archbishop-Justin-Welby-The-shady-Monsieur-Africa-6billion-mission-snap-Nigerias-oil-riches.html
to see just one of over 200 hundred ways she has been sodomized for you to know that indeed a serious injustice has been done to a people....several peoples?
It is just sad seeing so many accomplices to this huge crime. It is painful knowing as Nigerians we all are aiding and abetting this wrong by saying nothing. It is bad that with bribing of our "militants" and with the office of Vice President and by luck president, Nigerians feel justice has been done to that region. How wrong we all are.
To understand what is happening in the Niger Delta, imagine your blood was worth so much and then your father takes the blood, sells it, betters the lives of your siblings whom you have grown to almost hate and as you go thinner and sicker with no food to eat, he leaves the syringes and tubes with which he drew the blood on your bed to keep injuring you while your brothers and sisters and he live in a brand new beautiful house while leaving you in a dinghy dark eery room and only appears to come and get more of your blood even as you die away.
Now if when they sold your blood they took some of the money and bought you some milk and blood tonics and gave you a beautiful house too and all of your siblings and father benefit, I am sure you will not feel so hard done by, but LO! Oloibiri is a dead town with no oil left and no good roads or water nor do we know any of her sons or daughters who is a stakeholder in our oil industry. Every drop of blood has been drained from her veins by a vampire of a people called The Federal Republic of Dracula sorry NIGERIA.
http://oloibiri.blogspot.com/
Do not make a mistake. I do not absolve anyone of blame. The oil companies...ALL OF THEM... especially Haliburton, Elf, Shell, Mobil, Chevron etc have done things they should be ashamed of. The Nigerian Government...both Federal and at State level have been evil and uncariing and thieving....each and everyone of them. The community leaders....each King and their council and elders have been Judas Ischariots just as they were when they sold their people as slaves to the whiteman and got the coral beads on their heads...not as symbols of honour but one of shame and evidence of the fact that they have no love for those they claim they are custodians of. And the community leaders who even when the Oil Companies bring their stipend for the benefit of the people, they hoard it, build a mansion IN LAGOS and send their children to universities abroad on scholarships from these oil companies...scholarships that are no more than bribes for the children of the leaders and kings and politicians or military leaders and thus compromised, say nothing about the condomless rape of their people and their lands.
So much ado is now being made of "oil Block". What is an OIL BLOCK? Oil Block is a process whereby people's lands are taken from them and shared between the Nigerian Northern bourgeoisie and later resold or leased to a corrupt foreign company who without recourse to justice and fair play and good practices, go on to drain the oil from the land, displace the owners, destroy the ecology (plant and animal life), ruin the air, flair the gas at ground level (Yes, they didn't even bother to buil a pipe to take it up. It has been burning at ground level for years and years at Ugberikoko Sapele by SHELL) or a few meters above the ground (all over the Niger Delta) and the moneys therefrom used to make another Northern Nigerian super-wealthy (while the average Northerner remains uneducated and poor and ripe for Boko Haram recruitment) and Abuja beautiful and Lagos developed and Northern roads perfect and Niger Delta Governors billionaires and Sheikhs and everything else but those whose forebears farmed those soils.
The next few months gives Nigeria a chance to BEGIN to right a wrong that has gone on for too long...THE PIB (PETROLEUM INDUSTRY BILL). Herein the community whose land the oil is sourced from will be entitled to just 10 percent of PROFIT and not net of the crude oil.
Now an agent that hires out a house....he neither owns the house nor contributes a thing yet gets between ten and twenty percent when the house is rented or leased. Wizkid's manger gets 25 percent of all Wizkid's earnings just to take the phone and negotiate when Wizkid's services are needed. Now a community whose land has the oil, whose air will be polluted, whose waters will be polluted etc etc, it is asking that a paltry ten percent..not of the net, but after the company and federal government has removed her costs which will surely be inflated etc....ten percent of the declared profit, HOW CAN PEOPLE BEGRUDGE THIS? Pls define WITCHCRAFT. Let me define it. It is when the rest of Nigeria wants to maintain the status quo of injustice to those with the oil.
They have not asked for a back payment as the communities ought to. What happens to Oloibiri with no oil left? Can we do a Jesus Christ and resurrect that dead town? What the PIB (Petroleum Industry Bill) seeks to do is that going forward, the host communities be it Iboland, Yorubaland, Ijaw, Itsekiri, Okweri, Isoko Urhobo Bini, HAUSA (I hear there is a possibility of oil being there as Chad has found oil and it is same topography. I am aware of the billions spent on the thus far dry casting there) etc, wherever an oil company operates, ten percent of the profit must go towards developing that community. ANYONE WHO FIGHTS THIS IS A WITCH!!! This is only fair I tell you....it is less than fair. It should be 50 percent...my oil, your technology. It is why I said "begins to right the wrongs" as this is just a scratching of the surface of what is fair.
So today I call on all my Niger Deltans to SCREAM!!!!! Let your voices be heard from Uyo to Batere, from Oviri-court to Ologbo...wherever you are SHOUT FOR JUSTICE. I ask the Isokos whose lands have huge untapped oil reserves to SCREAM!!! that their lands do not become the new Oloibiri. I ask Itsekiris to take the hand of the Ijaws and Urhobos beside them and vice versa and all three along with the Delta Ibos and Isokos together in unity and unison SCREAM!!!
I ask the Yorubas of Ondo and all Oil producing areas of the West to join us. I ask Ibos whose lands have oil (coal is young oil. In a few million years that is oil. If there is coal, its elder brother is not far behind. America just found serious deposits of gas in rocks under sea called Shale Gas which they get by a process called "fragging") to chanel their inner Ojukwu and SCREAM!!!
And to all others in Nigeria, this is only fair. Yes a GEJ presidency gives the South-South a feeling of belonging and we have shown appreciation by letting you drill our oil and give us precious little back. We have watched you bribe our sons who were fighting for us....and majorly for their daily bread. But how long will this last? Will GEJ be there forever? Do we begin from where we stopped when he leaves and make oil exploration a risky venture once again? I wish to remind everyone that not a drop of oil is exploited in Ogoni and Odi lands today when both Abacha and Obasanjo felt killing our sons and mothers was the best way to get us to be quiescent and bend over for the painful "obukokwo".
Thus in one fell swoop we can get this done right. GET EVERYONE TO VOTE FOR THE PIB and have it passed into a law of the land. IT IS ONLY FAIR...and for you too because a peaceful progressive Niger-Delta is a peaceful economy for Nigeria.
Senator Ita Enang of Akwa Ibom/PDP (loving those representing Akwa Ibom from their former gov Duke to Akpabio now ENAng. Thanks for showing the rest of the Niger Delta how it is done) has shown the injustice.
NOW SCREAM!!!!
How does it feel to know that while Abuja and Lagos and other places have been developed by the proceeds from the oil, and not that the communities lose nothing but instead you not only take their oil, giving back nothing, you kill the plants and water and very life of that community...how does it make us all feel? And we went to church on Sunday and Mosque on Friday and the shrine everyday inbetween. What does it make us as a people who claim to worship a just God?
Do I need to share what Barr. Kemi Ajayi shared on my facebook wall about how ELF and the French in connivance with our leaders did evil business in the Niger Delta? Do you need to read this link http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2290904/Archbishop-Justin-Welby-The-shady-Monsieur-Africa-6billion-mission-snap-Nigerias-oil-riches.html
to see just one of over 200 hundred ways she has been sodomized for you to know that indeed a serious injustice has been done to a people....several peoples?
It is just sad seeing so many accomplices to this huge crime. It is painful knowing as Nigerians we all are aiding and abetting this wrong by saying nothing. It is bad that with bribing of our "militants" and with the office of Vice President and by luck president, Nigerians feel justice has been done to that region. How wrong we all are.
To understand what is happening in the Niger Delta, imagine your blood was worth so much and then your father takes the blood, sells it, betters the lives of your siblings whom you have grown to almost hate and as you go thinner and sicker with no food to eat, he leaves the syringes and tubes with which he drew the blood on your bed to keep injuring you while your brothers and sisters and he live in a brand new beautiful house while leaving you in a dinghy dark eery room and only appears to come and get more of your blood even as you die away.
Now if when they sold your blood they took some of the money and bought you some milk and blood tonics and gave you a beautiful house too and all of your siblings and father benefit, I am sure you will not feel so hard done by, but LO! Oloibiri is a dead town with no oil left and no good roads or water nor do we know any of her sons or daughters who is a stakeholder in our oil industry. Every drop of blood has been drained from her veins by a vampire of a people called The Federal Republic of Dracula sorry NIGERIA.
http://oloibiri.blogspot.com/
Do not make a mistake. I do not absolve anyone of blame. The oil companies...ALL OF THEM... especially Haliburton, Elf, Shell, Mobil, Chevron etc have done things they should be ashamed of. The Nigerian Government...both Federal and at State level have been evil and uncariing and thieving....each and everyone of them. The community leaders....each King and their council and elders have been Judas Ischariots just as they were when they sold their people as slaves to the whiteman and got the coral beads on their heads...not as symbols of honour but one of shame and evidence of the fact that they have no love for those they claim they are custodians of. And the community leaders who even when the Oil Companies bring their stipend for the benefit of the people, they hoard it, build a mansion IN LAGOS and send their children to universities abroad on scholarships from these oil companies...scholarships that are no more than bribes for the children of the leaders and kings and politicians or military leaders and thus compromised, say nothing about the condomless rape of their people and their lands.
So much ado is now being made of "oil Block". What is an OIL BLOCK? Oil Block is a process whereby people's lands are taken from them and shared between the Nigerian Northern bourgeoisie and later resold or leased to a corrupt foreign company who without recourse to justice and fair play and good practices, go on to drain the oil from the land, displace the owners, destroy the ecology (plant and animal life), ruin the air, flair the gas at ground level (Yes, they didn't even bother to buil a pipe to take it up. It has been burning at ground level for years and years at Ugberikoko Sapele by SHELL) or a few meters above the ground (all over the Niger Delta) and the moneys therefrom used to make another Northern Nigerian super-wealthy (while the average Northerner remains uneducated and poor and ripe for Boko Haram recruitment) and Abuja beautiful and Lagos developed and Northern roads perfect and Niger Delta Governors billionaires and Sheikhs and everything else but those whose forebears farmed those soils.
The next few months gives Nigeria a chance to BEGIN to right a wrong that has gone on for too long...THE PIB (PETROLEUM INDUSTRY BILL). Herein the community whose land the oil is sourced from will be entitled to just 10 percent of PROFIT and not net of the crude oil.
Now an agent that hires out a house....he neither owns the house nor contributes a thing yet gets between ten and twenty percent when the house is rented or leased. Wizkid's manger gets 25 percent of all Wizkid's earnings just to take the phone and negotiate when Wizkid's services are needed. Now a community whose land has the oil, whose air will be polluted, whose waters will be polluted etc etc, it is asking that a paltry ten percent..not of the net, but after the company and federal government has removed her costs which will surely be inflated etc....ten percent of the declared profit, HOW CAN PEOPLE BEGRUDGE THIS? Pls define WITCHCRAFT. Let me define it. It is when the rest of Nigeria wants to maintain the status quo of injustice to those with the oil.
They have not asked for a back payment as the communities ought to. What happens to Oloibiri with no oil left? Can we do a Jesus Christ and resurrect that dead town? What the PIB (Petroleum Industry Bill) seeks to do is that going forward, the host communities be it Iboland, Yorubaland, Ijaw, Itsekiri, Okweri, Isoko Urhobo Bini, HAUSA (I hear there is a possibility of oil being there as Chad has found oil and it is same topography. I am aware of the billions spent on the thus far dry casting there) etc, wherever an oil company operates, ten percent of the profit must go towards developing that community. ANYONE WHO FIGHTS THIS IS A WITCH!!! This is only fair I tell you....it is less than fair. It should be 50 percent...my oil, your technology. It is why I said "begins to right the wrongs" as this is just a scratching of the surface of what is fair.
So today I call on all my Niger Deltans to SCREAM!!!!! Let your voices be heard from Uyo to Batere, from Oviri-court to Ologbo...wherever you are SHOUT FOR JUSTICE. I ask the Isokos whose lands have huge untapped oil reserves to SCREAM!!! that their lands do not become the new Oloibiri. I ask Itsekiris to take the hand of the Ijaws and Urhobos beside them and vice versa and all three along with the Delta Ibos and Isokos together in unity and unison SCREAM!!!
I ask the Yorubas of Ondo and all Oil producing areas of the West to join us. I ask Ibos whose lands have oil (coal is young oil. In a few million years that is oil. If there is coal, its elder brother is not far behind. America just found serious deposits of gas in rocks under sea called Shale Gas which they get by a process called "fragging") to chanel their inner Ojukwu and SCREAM!!!
And to all others in Nigeria, this is only fair. Yes a GEJ presidency gives the South-South a feeling of belonging and we have shown appreciation by letting you drill our oil and give us precious little back. We have watched you bribe our sons who were fighting for us....and majorly for their daily bread. But how long will this last? Will GEJ be there forever? Do we begin from where we stopped when he leaves and make oil exploration a risky venture once again? I wish to remind everyone that not a drop of oil is exploited in Ogoni and Odi lands today when both Abacha and Obasanjo felt killing our sons and mothers was the best way to get us to be quiescent and bend over for the painful "obukokwo".
Thus in one fell swoop we can get this done right. GET EVERYONE TO VOTE FOR THE PIB and have it passed into a law of the land. IT IS ONLY FAIR...and for you too because a peaceful progressive Niger-Delta is a peaceful economy for Nigeria.
Senator Ita Enang of Akwa Ibom/PDP (loving those representing Akwa Ibom from their former gov Duke to Akpabio now ENAng. Thanks for showing the rest of the Niger Delta how it is done) has shown the injustice.
NOW SCREAM!!!!
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